BRUSSELS – In a recent interview NATO admitted it’s ready to forgive Turkey all the abuse, cheating and blatant terrorism support in Syria and Nagorno Karabakh. “It’s really my fault, I’ve been staying up late at work,
been too concentrated on my career and I haven’t been paying Turkey the attention it deserved. So no surprise it suddenly started transporting Syrian terrorists to Armenia, or threatening France with a Muslim uprising. I had it coming,” said NATO in a heart-to-heart interview with Oprah Winfrey. NATO is sure that Turkey’s plan to start a neo-Ottoman empire inspired by Third Reich is essentially a cry for help. “It just wants to be loved, that’s all. Turkey’s the real victim here, not the Armenians, not the Kurds or the Greeks. And the least I can do is apologize and offer more weapons and a card blanche to do whatever the hell it wants to do” admitted NATO.
NATO promises it’ll do whatever it takes to satisfy Turkey from now on. “We’ll undergo couples counseling, I’ll get rid of my Star Wars collectibles and will even agree to that threesome Turkey always insisted on.”