NEW YORK — President-elect Donald Trump has made what experts call “controversial yet historic” decision to legalize pussy-grabbing for medical purposes. Opposed by feminist activists, this move has yet to stand trial in Congress and Senate only after Trump takes office in January 2017.
Trump’s aide Maria McNilson calls it a difficult yet a forward-looking step in the right direction: “Let’s face it — who hates pussy-grabbing the most? The answer is obvious — Muslims! We can’t let them or other immigrants decide what’s right for America”.
Details of the move as well as its medical prescription procedures have not yet been presented, however the president-elect’s office has stated it may be a “state-by-state” process. Trump’s chief adviser Steve Bonnon says: “First it will be legalized for purely medical purposes in Colorado and Washington and possibly California and then we’ll take it from there”.
Opponents have raised concerns that medical pussy-grabbing can later be legalized also for recreational purposes. Yet, the concern is often mixed with elements of despair and acceptance. “Normally I’d be going ballistic over this kind of stuff,” — says Oprah Winfrey — “but from what it appears we’re fucked either way so why bother… There’s an easier and a more realistic solution — Canada”.