Guest blogger — Erik Grigoryan (edited by ArmComedy)
Disclaimer: Jokes and opinions expressed by Erik do not necessarily express official satiric policy of ArmComedy.
Russian local partner of WikiLeaks, Pionerskaya Pravda daily published a leaked document today revealing secret plans about dissolution of the state of Armenia and using its parts to kick off a new transnational corporation.
The leaked document reveals that on the aftermath of Forbes Magazine calling Armenia world’s second worst economy. Considering that the only stable export from Armenia for the last 2 decades has been the human capital, which has not been economically utilized to benefit the budget and/or the ruling elite, decision was made to introduce a gradual plan of radical legal and functional transformations of the country from a republic into a transnational corporation that would provide human capital.
The plan seeks to establish the corporation on the basis of the current republic, and offer human resource base and solutions for major industries oversees, such as construction and services. The corporation will be called ManPower Armenia LLC with a Headquarter in Moscow and local branch in Yerevan. Offices will be established in cities with sizable construction and service industries as well as Armenian population including controversial neighbor Turkey.
Distinguished PR specialist, the head of Deem Communications, expatriate Raffi Niziblian, was mentioned to be consulted for a possible major 3 year re-branding and promo campaign in Armenia and abroad.
Radical opposition representative Levon Zurabyan interprets these plans as a step to change the legal status of Armenia aiming to rule out early elections. “In a transnational corporations as in our country, the elections of the management team and the CEO, are often not very clear and transparent, so this legal status will help the regime regenerate itself in the long run, without getting all the criticism Ilham Aliyev got for changing the constitution and removing the office term limit”, Zurabian stated in a press conference.
Experts argue that the current plan is not a direct product of the Forbes’ ranking, but the news simply has catalyzed it. Expert Imatsyan notes that the June 6-8 visit of the Armenian minister of Labor and Social Affairs to Qatar, a country that has less then 1000 Armenians and many even at the foreign ministry would find it hard to locate it on the map, proves that the current regime has had the transformation plan months ago and that is why the minister was in Qatar signing agreements on engaging Armenian workforce in Qatar’s thriving economy.