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Diaspora Ministry Accidentally Hands Appreciation Certificate to Giant Cheeseburger

"We don't have any fancy cheeseburger-detecting equipment", Hakobyan

YEREVAN, MINISTRY OF DIASPORA – On March 3d Ministry of Diaspora awarded an appreciation certificate to an individual, who introduced himself as an Armenian 17-year-old Oxford graduate prodigy, Ph.D. in linguistics Arthur Buniatyan. However, it was discovered 6 days later that a terrible misunderstanding had taken place and the appreciation was given to an unusually large cheeseburger.

To recap, “Arthur Buniatyan” managed to also fool multiple intelligentsia groups in Bashikiria, Russia, where he moved to with family at the age of 7, as well as certain distinguished Russian politicians.

“Buniatyan” claims that he has taken up linguistics at the age of five and in 2009 discovered a new word “Shmampkin” for which he was graced by the Oxford University with a degree of doctor in linguistics. And in 2016 he is scheduled to be the first Armenian who takes the British Queen to Garni-Geghard.

The young scientists association – ARMACAD – has managed to expose the fraud and prove that Arthur Buniatyan is but a jumbo McDonald’s cheeseburger and that the Oxford diploma is a phony.

Arhtur finds favor with Russian politicians

ARMACAD chairman Khachik Gevorgyan shared is disappointment with our crew, “Of course, the hoax was clear to us from the beginning. But we all got a kick out of it, until the state officials started to appreciate him on national level…”

Gevorgyan summarizes, “We had to intervene, since at his elevation rate he could shape political weight. And we are just a year away from parliamentary elections. We definitely don’t need another cheeseburger in the parliament”.

Following the embarrassing discovery, Diaspora Ministry posted a press release on its website which states: “We recommend not getting emotional and fussing about the unusual situation. Indeed, we happened to hand an appreciation certificate to… a giant cheeseburger. However it is important to keep in mind that every day tens of various types of people and employees walk into our building and it may be difficult at times to tell who is a regular talented person and who is just a…  sandwich”.

Arthur shares his linguistic thesis at the ministry

During his meeting at the ministry, Arthur had presented his concept for collaboration with Diaspora and many of his suggestions had been included into the agendas of the senior ministry staff. However, the latter assure that in light of the recent exposure, the suggestions will be removed from the ministry strategy – specifically the idea of a two-chamber parliament.

It is noteworthy that the appreciation certificate to Arthur by Hranush Hakobyan “highly appreciates the intellectual potential and contribution to preservation and promotion of Armenian values around the world.” It also calls on Arthur to use his talent  for the benefit of Armenian cause.

 

“We do not have any fancy cheeseburger-detecting equipment at the ministry” Hakobyan.

3 Comments

  1. niceman niceman 11/03/2011

    էէէէէէ սենց չեղավ. վեբիզոդ ենք ուզում …

  2. mi tex kardaci`Ողջունեք Երբևէ “տեղի ունեցած” ԱմենաԲրդուճասեր նախարարությանը ev հաջորդը քյաբաբիկի ընդունելությունն ա commentnern, voronc lracnelu ban chka parzapes :DDDDD

Մեկնաբանությունները փակ են.